I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
