Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
