:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
