Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
