Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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