on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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