why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
