okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I supernannyed him into submission
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Randomize