ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Randomize
