You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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