I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
