i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
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