what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
