i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
