is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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