Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
