Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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