Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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