They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
