We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Randomize