So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
