I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
