I cockslap morals
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Randomize
