i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
We have so much sex to catch up on
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
