I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
