Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize