Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Randomize