we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize