I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
He did a backflip because drugs
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
