The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize