apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Randomize