It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Randomize
