My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Randomize
