i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize