a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
