I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
