Small penises have feelings too.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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