I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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