Kiss
Puke
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
