Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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