At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I would ride that face into the sunset
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
