ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Randomize
