He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize
