when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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