Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
