no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
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