just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
