I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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