Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
He better not be in your backpack
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
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