Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Randomize
